Every day since we returned home Toren shows continued improvement. It is quite amazing to watch the daily shifts. About a week ago we celebrated that he had enough strength in his hands to open the plastic bag inside the cereal box. This morning, after a couple of inches of snow he shoveled the pavement, carefully.
Toren has the best attitude one could hope for, he came with me to Shul for minyan today, and thoroughly enjoyed it. He was very touched to get the last Aliyah, and did a great job, even with the tremor in his voice he was clear and musical. He has decided to keep going to minyan with me. Everyone was thrilled to see him.
Toren is working diligently in all areas of his recovery. He has speech, ot and pt twice a week, and will be back at his cognitive rehab program 3 times per week after new years. He is learning to use a day timer religiously to help retrain his memory and allow him to be more independent. He reflects several times each day on his day, and he is appreciative of the process.
This weekend Helaini and I took 36 hours off for just girlie time and Toren spent the weekend with our dear friends Rabbis Linda and Jonathan and their kids. He had a great time, reading, playing games, watching a movie, going to services, and even managing to do hide work with Rabbi Linda on Sunday morning... he sanded two hides. Toren is getting stronger every day, every week. (Helaini and I had great fun, lots of yoga, great food, we even went to MASS MOCA - saw the Sol Lewitt exhibit - mind blowing).
Last week Toren started to use the treadmill again at PT and while he was exhausted from 10 minutes on the treadmill at a very slow walk (he napped for over 2 hours afterwards) however when I consider that he needed a walker the week previously, it is wonderful and truly miraculous. Toren has gone with Marvin several mornings to help take care of the horses, which he has thoroughly enjoyed.
While Toren still has work to do... life is returning to a more normal pace and healthy rhythms are becoming established. Or as Toren likes to say it is coming back to somewhat normal. We all remain touched by being held in the circles of prayer and concern by those who love us.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Home Sweet Home - Praise God
It was so good to get home.
To sleep in our own beds, to eat our own food... okay and yes the Chinese food left overs from Friday night too.
To shower in our own place, to run life on our own schedule, and not hear nurses in the background, not have vital signs checked in the wee hours.
The list of joys is long and worthy of note.
Helaini spent some of the afternoon and evening with us... allowing me to get scripts filled, pick up milk and chocolate, and walk Lilah in a light snow. It was cold but very, very beautiful, and it stuck - so this morning Toren woke to the beauty of it all and was so delighted. We got to play scrabble together, just Toren and I - a typical Shabbos activity (so nice to return to tried and true activities) - he did so well, it was truly a miracle to see the difference a week can make. Last week just mustering the strength to say yes and no was huge, this week he is making his way up the stairs carefully, but without being too exhausted upon reaching the top.
Today (Sunday) Marvin came over early so I could walk Lilah, and then teach Sunday School. Toren and I had breakfast together in our own kitchen, at our own table... he had his favorite cereal (raisin bran) and he was able to express his joy in the sense of normalcy that prevailed. It is so very good to be picking up the threads of our lives again. Toren went for a car ride with Marvin to enjoy the snow and the sunlight. He showered using the new shower chair... it is incredible the difference these simple tools make - providing a sense of freedom and dignity. Toren played cards with Helaini after she was done teaching, and then simply drifted off to a restful early afternoon nap.
It is heartwarming to climb the stairs, find both my children safely in my nest, and listen to the sound of Toren sleeping as I write this. While the journey is far from over, and while we will need patience aplenty for the road ahead, I am confident that we can do it with the support we will continue to get, with the strength we can draw from each other, and with the encouragement of our friends and family.
Toren and I are trying to put this in perspective, to let this crisis shrink into the distance, to learn what we need to from it, and to allow it to become only a bump in the road. It might not happen overnight, but in time it might just be the Thanksgiving we missed in North Carolina, or the chance to acknowledge the often overlooked blessings of speech, sight, moving of limbs, or the invaluable gift of loving community, friends and family.
I hear rumblings... time to enjoy the company of my wonderful son. Shavuah Tov
To sleep in our own beds, to eat our own food... okay and yes the Chinese food left overs from Friday night too.
To shower in our own place, to run life on our own schedule, and not hear nurses in the background, not have vital signs checked in the wee hours.
The list of joys is long and worthy of note.
Helaini spent some of the afternoon and evening with us... allowing me to get scripts filled, pick up milk and chocolate, and walk Lilah in a light snow. It was cold but very, very beautiful, and it stuck - so this morning Toren woke to the beauty of it all and was so delighted. We got to play scrabble together, just Toren and I - a typical Shabbos activity (so nice to return to tried and true activities) - he did so well, it was truly a miracle to see the difference a week can make. Last week just mustering the strength to say yes and no was huge, this week he is making his way up the stairs carefully, but without being too exhausted upon reaching the top.
Today (Sunday) Marvin came over early so I could walk Lilah, and then teach Sunday School. Toren and I had breakfast together in our own kitchen, at our own table... he had his favorite cereal (raisin bran) and he was able to express his joy in the sense of normalcy that prevailed. It is so very good to be picking up the threads of our lives again. Toren went for a car ride with Marvin to enjoy the snow and the sunlight. He showered using the new shower chair... it is incredible the difference these simple tools make - providing a sense of freedom and dignity. Toren played cards with Helaini after she was done teaching, and then simply drifted off to a restful early afternoon nap.
It is heartwarming to climb the stairs, find both my children safely in my nest, and listen to the sound of Toren sleeping as I write this. While the journey is far from over, and while we will need patience aplenty for the road ahead, I am confident that we can do it with the support we will continue to get, with the strength we can draw from each other, and with the encouragement of our friends and family.
Toren and I are trying to put this in perspective, to let this crisis shrink into the distance, to learn what we need to from it, and to allow it to become only a bump in the road. It might not happen overnight, but in time it might just be the Thanksgiving we missed in North Carolina, or the chance to acknowledge the often overlooked blessings of speech, sight, moving of limbs, or the invaluable gift of loving community, friends and family.
I hear rumblings... time to enjoy the company of my wonderful son. Shavuah Tov
Friday, December 4, 2009
Friday Afternoon... preparing to go home
We have spent the morning meeting with social workers and therapists sorting out what support can best help Toren come home and transition successfully and easily. He is gaining strength every day, and it does a heart good to see him. Toren is devouring food every time it appears. Working hard to regain his skills. He is walking up and down the stairs with just a little support - which is such a leap it is delightful to behold. His PT spent a lot of the session encouraging Toren to pace himself... going slowly is safer, better for building strength and balance, and will allow his lungs to recover steadily. As Toren says he is excited to be leaving the hospital and excited to be experiencing life instead of just recovery. As nice as hospitals are it is not nearly as nice as being home, because as he says at home you can do as you wish!! (We will see about that!!)
So we are heading home tomorrow with a walker, and with the caution to have 24 hour support over the next stage of recovery, with serious instructions to take it very easy for the first few days home. I am stilling here watching him eat and feeling a sense of appreciation that seeps into the stored dark scary places in my being... and while it does not evaporate the fears and pain it does dilute them, and restores balance and expands the flickering flame of hope.
There are more meetings and more therapy this afternoon, and then Helaini will join us for Shabbos Dinner... no I haven't cooked, we will order something nice in - maybe Chinese food, so we can have the whole Jewish Xmas experience early.
The house is all clean, Melinda came and helped me get things organized and cleaned on Thursday - God bless her. When I got home I found a lovely veggie casserole from the Bernards... it was the perfect thing to find - so I had it for dinner, breakfast and lunch - what a treat. Walking with Linda helped me get some perspective, a good cry & laugh on the phone with Jonathan allowed me to gather the energy to teach my yoga class... and just to make you laugh... there was a fire drill in the middle of my class (God has quite the sense of humor). Marvin took a 30 hour shift here at the hospital to allow me to enjoy all those blessings... he and Toren enjoyed each other's company, and Toren was more appreciative of me after a break from my company.
I am looking forward to making a crockpot full of soup tomorrow afternoon, so we can simply chill out and enjoy the quiet, and yes fussing with Lilah who was very very happy to see me on Wednesday when I arrived home for the first time since the 11th. Life will start to take shape over the next few days, Toren will have out patient therapy for speech, ot and pt, and will start back at the NPRS Program hopefully next week... at lot of the challenges he is having is related to the strain of the last 3 weeks' trauma... once that is resolved and recovered from we will see what else needs addressing over the coming months. We are very hopeful, grateful and positive about the future, looking at ways to avoid another crisis will become a serious focus for us. As Shabbat draws in I am full of delight and appreciation. enjoy your families, your homes, your friends, and take the time to look at the candles as the flicker and sense the brightness of our love and tenderness for each and everyone of you.
Shabbat Shalom
M & T
So we are heading home tomorrow with a walker, and with the caution to have 24 hour support over the next stage of recovery, with serious instructions to take it very easy for the first few days home. I am stilling here watching him eat and feeling a sense of appreciation that seeps into the stored dark scary places in my being... and while it does not evaporate the fears and pain it does dilute them, and restores balance and expands the flickering flame of hope.
There are more meetings and more therapy this afternoon, and then Helaini will join us for Shabbos Dinner... no I haven't cooked, we will order something nice in - maybe Chinese food, so we can have the whole Jewish Xmas experience early.
The house is all clean, Melinda came and helped me get things organized and cleaned on Thursday - God bless her. When I got home I found a lovely veggie casserole from the Bernards... it was the perfect thing to find - so I had it for dinner, breakfast and lunch - what a treat. Walking with Linda helped me get some perspective, a good cry & laugh on the phone with Jonathan allowed me to gather the energy to teach my yoga class... and just to make you laugh... there was a fire drill in the middle of my class (God has quite the sense of humor). Marvin took a 30 hour shift here at the hospital to allow me to enjoy all those blessings... he and Toren enjoyed each other's company, and Toren was more appreciative of me after a break from my company.
I am looking forward to making a crockpot full of soup tomorrow afternoon, so we can simply chill out and enjoy the quiet, and yes fussing with Lilah who was very very happy to see me on Wednesday when I arrived home for the first time since the 11th. Life will start to take shape over the next few days, Toren will have out patient therapy for speech, ot and pt, and will start back at the NPRS Program hopefully next week... at lot of the challenges he is having is related to the strain of the last 3 weeks' trauma... once that is resolved and recovered from we will see what else needs addressing over the coming months. We are very hopeful, grateful and positive about the future, looking at ways to avoid another crisis will become a serious focus for us. As Shabbat draws in I am full of delight and appreciation. enjoy your families, your homes, your friends, and take the time to look at the candles as the flicker and sense the brightness of our love and tenderness for each and everyone of you.
Shabbat Shalom
M & T
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